Sammy - Supporting Actress

Sammy Marie – When I first met Sammy, she was exactly as I expected: quiet, unassuming, shy, behind bright blue captivating eyes. We automatically hugged because having spoken prior we had built a kind of kinship found between an aunt and niece as she refers. She says I remind her of her aunt which is a huge compliment since that is who primarily raised her.

In speaking with Sammy for the first time and really getting to know her, I scramble through my brain of metaphors to compare her to someone for my readers to identify. In the movie, “The Holiday” Kate Winslet is eating dinner with the 80 year old screen writer who tells her that she is a supporting actress in her own life, she’s not even the main character. That is the best way for me to see Sammy. Her own life has yet to begin; she has been the supporting actress in everyone else’s drama tossed from one scene to the next with no real regard for her own feelings, or storyline.

As a child, she played supporting actress between her parent’s poor choices; being tossed like a Frisbee between them and then eventually staying with her aunt being separated from her siblings. And like a Frisbee, when its usefulness was over, put in a box until the next time it was needed or useful. She learned to keep her head down and hide and is still doing this, playing turtle… don’t notice me…..

Children who grow up this way usually grow up with an overdeveloped heart. Because they haven’t had enough people in their lives to equally distribute their love to in childhood and adolescence, they have an abundance to give as young adults. This is the excuse I give for Sammy being as deeply caring and passionate as she is. It is also the reason she will continuously make poor choices when it comes to men; she wants to believe the best in everyone especially her children’s father. But even with him, she was just a supporting actress as it turns out.

The benefit of this role is that she is always there for everyone else. She is supportive, loyal, fierce, and strong for everyone else. She is SuperMom to her kids, Wonderdaughter to her ailing mom, Batfriend to all of her friends; meaning she has a superhero title when she is working for or helping someone else, unfortunately she has yet to claim her own identity.

With such empathy, she could follow her dreams and be a nurse, but money, time, and her children, are an excuse. So, she will forever be caught in a twister of indecisiveness until she is ready to become the lead role in her own life. Her potential limitless, her beauty astounding, her kindness overwhelming. We often don’t realize the worst enemies in our lives is ourselves and our fear of motion. Staying stagnant is a decision; it’s safe; it’s a Frisbee in a boxes life. But I want to see Sammy soar. Like Kafka, I want Sammy to Metamorphosis from one ridiculous thing into another. I want Sammy to morph from a Frisbee into the Eagle she was meant to be and discover all that one can do when no one else is there to throw or catch you. Because Sammy is a survivor, wouldn’t it be wonderful to see what she could accomplish?